How “How We Clean, Sortof” is Working, Sortof


It’s Friday, and according to our little cleaning schedule, it’s the day to clean bathrooms and the refrigerator. My plan was to quick clean the upstairs toilet and then take a shower as soon as I put the 2nd kid down for a nap. But I got all the way downstairs after getting them blissfully into their napping states, and remembered that I plumb forgot!

So I decided to figure out toilets and showering (does it bother anyone else to put those two words in the same sentence? ewe.) later, and to move on to #3 on nap time agenda, baking cookies for Little Honey’s birthday.

As I’m returning a larger bag of whole wheat flour than the one I took out (don’t ask) to the refrigerator, more room needed to be made. And as I unceremoniously shoved a leftover container full of really very old hummus (that should have been cleaned out at last week’s refrigerator cleaning event), that darn thing had the gall to nudge a quart sized glass jar of something else (that should also have been made scarce last week), and IT had the guts to teeter and totter and finally fall to the hard tile floor, of course spilling its contents and breaking in the process. Rude. (as my friend would say)

But as I have been wont to say these last few weeks of sortof trying to sortof clean, “egregious”. That’s right, egregious. What “egregious” means, according to the dictionary, is: this cleaning thing is soooo working!

Here’s why:

  1. we stick to the schedule, but only when something egregious doesn’t get in the way. This includes illness and personal priorities like spending time with people,
  2. we stick to the schedule, but only when something egregious happens. This includes large spills on the floor of things like, say, half a box of Cheerios, on a day that is not designated for floor cleaning. I go ahead and clean up those darn cheerios because it is an egregious mess,
  3. in the case of a moldy refrigerator item falling to the floor on a Friday, something egregious both interrupted the routine (#1) and supported the routine (#2),
  4. egregious is a very fun word to say many times a day,
  5. egregious is a word that makes one feel smart as well as accomplished.

The end. Egregious.

No, really, the end.


Miss Mary Egregious Clare

PS: Honey, when you get home, I’m gonna need your help to move the refrigerator and clean underneath it. Because, egregious.


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